Quiet Strength

'In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength.' Isaiah 30:15 

After making it through the holidays, and completely overdoing myself, I have had a challenging couple of days.  I spent yesterday out and about enjoying myself at the art museum and military museum, but toward the end of my outing my legs decided they would partake no more.  I was lucky enough to have my daughter there to help me out to the car.  As we headed home I felt the frustration of knowing that I am in for another exacerbation, but I also know that it will end.  To add to the frustration, my favorite weather blew in today...snow!  I love, more than anything, to get out in the snow and play with my children.  Today I cannot, because my exacerbation is continuing to take my ability to walk.  I have spent most of my day in my recliner and the rest in my wheelchair.  Am I bummed? Absolutely.  Have I complained, absolutely  not!  I am being quiet, both outwardly and inwardly when it comes to this frustration.  I am trusting the Lord that my ability to walk will return soon.  Even though I go through frustrations, anger and sadness at the changes that have come into my life since my MS has started to take over, I always know that my Lord God loves me, he is here with me and will always walks with me, and when I can't walk...he carries me.  Right now I am being carried.  So today, as I sit in my recliner and watch the beautiful snowflakes fall outside, I can be thankful, today my Heavenly Father is sitting with me enjoying the show, letting me know that I will get through this. 

As I read this scripture it reminds me of how much God loves me...he loves me so much that just as he told the people of Judah to return to him, to find rest and strength in him, he also tells me to return to him as well.  Just when I am feeling sorry for myself because of my MS, or just when I am angry about my MS....God tells me to return to him.  He tells me to dwell on him, not my symptoms, not my disease...only on him. When I return my focus to him, I am no longer unhappy about my trials, because God walks me through those trials and sees me through.  This, my friends, is how I choose to live my life because this is the only way to live my life.  I choose to return to him.