Accountability

I had a great conversation today with one of my best friends.  She is truly a beautiful sister in Christ and has helped me through so much in my life.  While we talked she said something that just clicked in my head and made me think about accountability.  I thought about how accountable I have truly been when it comes to my walk with Christ, and my eyes were opened to many mistakes I have made in the past, and some that I still make today.  While there is no way that I can be perfect in the flesh, there are so many ways in which I could do better.  So what exactly is accountability?  I see it as this: I am accountable for everything I do, I have to answer to God, when my times comes, and be accountable for every action I chose on this earth.  I know the basic rights and wrongs, and do very well when it comes to making good choices in those areas, but what about other areas?  How do I learn from mistakes I make?  How do I make sure that I make the right choice when I am faced with an angry woman at the checkout line at the grocery store?  The answer is simple: I need to be asking myself what will God say to me about this?  The other day I was face to face with a woman who felt like I cut in front of her at the grocery store, she was yelling at me and being very rude in front of everyone in the store.  This was my chance to be accountable for my own actions and show her what a true Christian woman would do, but did I?  Let me just say I failed miserably!  But I also took something from this whole scene, I learned to think before I speak, I learned to ask myself "What will God say to me about this?"  I also learned that I need to feel a little humility so that I can be open to what I am thinking and doing so that I  can receive encouragement and reproof, when it is needed.  Talking to my friend today gave me encouragement and made me realize that I need to continue to grow in my walk with the Lord and in my accountability to him and to others. I was able to receive that encouragement and apply it to my life because I was open to what I was hearing.  I find it most important to stay open and honest with yourself and the Lord, and the growth will continue and your life will be blessed in so many beautiful ways!

Lord in Heaven, I worship your name!  You find so many ways to bless me and teach me.  Lord I pray for a continued open mind and open heart so that I may continue to grow closer to you.  Lord I pray that you show me the people in my life that will serve as great accountability partners and keep them close in my life. I pray that you show me the areas that I need to be more accountability and strengthen me in those areas. Amen

Nothing Is Impossible

A certain scripture came across my path this morning and lit my heart up with amazing hope and love!!  Jesus said, "I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed...nothing will be impossible for you." Matthew 17:20-21  How beautiful is that?  Jesus tells us to have faith, even the smallest amount of faith makes all things possible.  When I read this, so many different trials in my life flashed in front of me. Some were small and a lot were huge, including my MS, but I thought about them a little deeper this time.  Who am I kidding, I REALLY thought about the many different trials I have faced and how I actually made it through them.  Did I really make it through them alone, all on my own, or was God there with me, helping me through? The answer is simple, I never do anything on my own, because my life is not my own. It belongs to God, I am just a servant.  Each and every trial I face is never faced alone, he is with me every single second of my journey through this life.  This includes my current walk with MS.  I do not consider this a fight with MS, because there is no reason to fight it.  I walk with it and God walks with me.  I will never face this disease alone. So many wonder why I consider this disease a blessing, and this is one of those reasons.  It has brought my relationship with God to a whole new level.  This is why I can face the walk with MS and not worry about the fight.  For the first 10 years of this disease we were not sure what it was, and my faith was that of a mustard seed, but that seed has grown into a beautiful tree that sprouts new life each and every day.  It created a hope for me that has only grown over time.  That small little mustard seed made getting through easier, and it now makes walking through a breeze. Notice I said "walking" through, because I no longer just "get" through it, I walk through it with the amazing grace of God surrounding me. Finding peace with my disease was never impossible, the peace was always there, just waiting for me find it.

Lord God, you tell me that even with a little faith nothing is impossible.  Lord I build on that faith every day and thank you so much for the blessing of MS.  Without this blessing I may have never found the peace I was looking for, and I may have never grown into the beautiful daughter you intended me to be.  Lord I continue to grow everyday, and I ask for your continued walk, guidance and grace as I do so. Amen.

His Grace is Sufficient

I have found that MS makes me weak...physically and mentally.  I have never been a weak person until this disease took hold of my body.  It is something I do not like because it means change for me. It has caused me to take a deeper look at myself and my life around me, although that has not been a bad thing because it has caused me to take a deeper look into my faith and the hope that lies there. A scripture crossed my path this morning that made me think even deeper about this weakness that I now possess.  2 Corinthians 12:9 " But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (NIV)  Paul was enduring a great suffering, a "thorn in his flesh"(v7) yet he rejoiced in that suffering. God didn't take this thorn away and I had to ask myself why.  I also suffer with a thorn in my flesh, the thorn of Multiple Sclerosis, and what a thorn it can be!! I relate to Paul's cry to have the Lord "take it away from him" (v8). But I realized, through these scriptures that something beautiful is happening.  God works through our weakness, his power can work beautifully when we are at our weakest point. Paul continues by saying " I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness, so that Christ's power my rest on me" (v9) and I realized that I should rejoice in my own thorn, because Christ's power can then rest on me.  I no longer look at this disease as a thorn, but rather a blessing.  It is a true blessing to have Christ's power laid on you. It is an awakening experience that will change your life.  The decision I have made to see this disease as a blessing will allow Christ to work many wonders, not just in my life but the life of others.  "That is why for Christ's sake, I delight in (my) weakness, in (my) insults, in (my) hardships, in (my) persecutions, in (my ) difficulties, For when I am weak, then I am strong. (v10) ( "my"parenthesis added by me).  I will delight when I am weak and and struggling, I will delight when I am insulted by others because of my illness, I will delight in the hardships that this illness has put in front of me, I will delight in persecutions I face in Christ's name and I will delight in my difficulties, why? Because I am weak and I am covered in the strength of Jesus Christ!!!

Lord God almighty, I praise you with every breath I take.  You have made me strong, even though I am weak. You have given me wisdom to make it through, knowing that I am not going to be taken out of every trial in my life, but that you will be there to give me the strength I need to endure. How beautiful is this disease that it has brought me more strength than I could have ever imagined, it has brought me closer to you. Amen.

Worry Free????

Every person on the face of this planet worries.  We are human, we cannot help but worry when things are not going as we planned them to. I worry about my kids, my husband, money, the future and with MS, I worry about my health.  Am I supposed to worry? NO!  God tells us not to worry.  So today I wanted to reflect on God's word when it comes to worrying.  I am reflecting today because this morning I woke to my head swimming with things to worry about and I need to feel uplifted today!  So lets begin with looking at what the word "worry" means. The dictionary describes worry as : to torment oneself with or suffer from disturbing thoughts, or to torment with cares, anxieties, etc.; trouble; plague.  WOW!  When I read this I realize that I am tormenting myself.  I am causing my own suffering!  Why on earth would I want to do that?  This is why I look to God for my strength to stop the worry, to let it go into his hands instead of using my own hands to create suffering.  Matt 6:34 says  “So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today." (NLT)  This came from Jesus himself. I trust Jesus with my life, he has given me everlasting life, so when I read this I know to trust him with my worries...to go through today's troubles without worrying about tomorrows.  So what about today's worries?  Jesus also said in Matt 6:25  “That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? "  What this says to me is to stop worrying about these things and instead look at your world in a different light.  Take a different point of view.  Enjoy the chirping of the birds in the morning or the sound of your children laughing in the afternoon.  Life is so much more than monetary things and so much bigger than the disease I have.  If all else fails, and you just cannot seem to pull yourself out of the worry valley....PRAY...then remember you are not alone.  Keep Psalm 23:4 close to your heart: Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me.(NLT)   No matter what your circumstance is, you are never alone.  Let him take your worries, let him take your fears, let God walk with you through those valleys in protection and comforting love.


Lord, you are my beautiful and loving father.  You comfort me and walk with me daily.  Though worries may creep into my head, you tell me not to worry. Lord I pray for strength to pull on these scriptures and the ability to keep them in my mind and my heart.  My memory fades easily and I pray for your Holy Spirit to whisper these words of wisdom in my ear every time I need them.  I give my worries to you Lord. My life is in your hands, as it always has been.  I praise you and I thank you in your son, Jesus Christ name.  Amen

Freedom is a True Blessing

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Hebrews 11:1 (NIV)   When I read this scripture I realize how truly blessed I am.  I may have MS, but I have a hope that lies in an everlasting life free of pain and suffering.  I am certain of that life because I have faith in God and faith in his word.  I may not be able to see God, but I know he is there because of my faith in him.  God's truth (his word) has set me free (John 8:32 Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.") from any bondage that this disease may have put on me.  I may have challenges in this world when it comes to mental clarity and physical ability, but it will never take away the freedom I have in knowing my savior.  It will never take away the blessing I have of eternal life through Jesus Christ.  This I am certain of, this I know for sure: One day I will live a life free of MS, free of suffering and full of rejoicing and happiness!!

My heavenly father, your a truly amazing. You love me daily without fail. You have blessed me with your word and it has set me free. I am blessed with your spirit and blessed with a life that is everlasting.  My trials here on earth are many, but my eternal reward outweighs them all.  I will push through these trials with you by my side, all the while knowing of the great eternity I have with you.  I pray for your strength when facing these trails and for your guidance while walking through them always keeping my faith strong and my hope intact.  You are my strength, you are my rock, you are my savior. Amen.

A Caring Husband

I was blessed several years ago to meet the most wonderful man on the face of this planet.....my husband.  I have never met a more caring and loving man than he is. He is man of few words but his actions speak louder than any word that could come out of his mouth.  When I am not feeling well, he is there to support me, to help with the house and the kids and anything that I need help with. He brings me anything I ask for when I am feeling sick and in bed. He has never made fun of me for the illness I have or the symptoms that I endure and I know he never will.  He may not understand how I feel physically and mentally, but he does his best to make my life better and easier.

Today, as he walked toward the car after work, I looked at him and thought how lucky I really am and thought to myself, "how much do I show  him that he is appreciated and loved?" So this post is for my loving husband, the man of my dreams, the only man that God would put me with knowing the illness and trials that I would face in the future.  No one would be there for me like my husband is, so today I thank God above for blessing me with a wonderful husband and wonderful daddy to my children.  You are one of a kind and I am the luckiest woman to have you in my life.

Lord God in Heaven, you are a wonderful and powerful God that knows the future. You knew my path before I ever met my husband, and you led me straight to him and him to me. I thank you, Lord, for the blessing of a man who keeps your word in his heart and shows it in his life. Be with him always and guide him in his paths, bless him Lord in all he does. In your sons name, Christ Jesus, I thank you. Amen

Why I am Blessed

I am blessed because I have a close and personal relationship with my Lord and savior. Everyday is a new and beautiful walk with Christ by my side.  I may have been diagnosed with an incurable disease, but that does not mean my life is over, as a matter of fact, it has just begun. I created this blog to keep up with my thoughts on the many ways I am blessed each and every day.  It is to keep my thoughts in order since, as anyone with MS knows, my brain is extremely scattered the majority of the time.  I want to be able to remember and reflect on the blessings I felt and I hope that this will also help others reflect on blessings of their own.